Morning sickness (not what you think)

"I wake up scared/I wake up strange..." -- What a Good Boy, BNL

Scared and strange? Nah ... I just woke up feeling kind of nauseated. A couple of months ago, I would have blamed the feeling on Effexor discontinuation. Now I blame it on stress and lack of sleep. I actually remember a milder version of this feeling from summer camp as a kid. It's waking up feeling like something's not right and realizing I'm in a bunk bed in a strange place. It's that feeling.

I avoid turning over for fear that I'll get sick on the bed. (Note to self: It was a good idea to put a trash can by the bed in case you throw up. It was a bad idea to put the mesh trash can by the bed because that doesn't do a whole lot of good, now does it?) I dug the SK out of my purse and called Paul. He said he'd be home by 10 a.m.

He's been there 24 hours now. I went up to visit last night, spent a couple of hours finishing up the painting I started Friday (a '70s "Keep On Truckin'" cartoon throwback, complete with a horrificly retro avocado-ish background. I'll scan it at some point...). I left at 2 a.m., went to Walgreens to buy makeup and Pepsi, came home and slept. And he's still running the tail end of a linearity study.

"I recognize this feeling," I told Paul over the phone. "It feels like when I was at (Matt's friend's) house, panicking, not sleeping, worried for no good reason. I think I need some crackers to calm my stomach."

He told me where to find some Saltines. After I got off the phone, I meted out two Lamictal, a Klonopin and a dimenhydrinate. Unfortunately, I haven't had a prescrip for Phenergan for years, and I was denied a prescrip when I was coming off the Effexor, even though I begged for something to keep me from being so sick. I ended up on doxylamine and B6 at Jeremy's suggestion, and I usually take a doxylamine before bedtime. But last night, I was too exhausted. I'm kicking myself for not taking one to help me sleep and fight the nausea. But hey, water under the bridge.

I feel a lot better now that the meds are kicking in and Paul's almost home.

You know, it's funny ... when I first got married, it was really strange sharing a bed with someone. I'd wake up when he rolled over (or stole the sheets or got out of bed for a glass or water). Now it feels strange and lonely to sleep alone. To turn over and be looking at the wall instead of at my hubby.

Guess that's a sign that I'm still comfortably in love. :-)