Recent fortune cookie fortunes
These are real fortune cookie fortunes I've collected over the past couple of months. Yes, I save them.
- We can learn from everyone, especially from our enemies.
- Listen attentively. You will come out ahead.
- He who takes notes listens well.
- Personal achievement will be your key to happiness.
- The view changes only for the leading dog.
- Count each separate day as a separate life.
- You will step on the soil of many countries.
- You feed your body every day. You must also feed your mind.
- You and your spouse will be happy in your life together.
- Time heals all wounds. Keep your chin up.
- You are busy but you are happy. (This was punctuated by smiley faces on either side.)
- The strengths in your character will bring you serenity.
Also, check out the gold and silver fortune cookies with fortunes written on satin ribbons. Man, that's like the Lexus of cookies, no? :)
posted by Kate at 8:20 AM
Copyright 2001-2009, L.K.C.S. It's MINE, all MINE. If you wanna use it, gimme credit and a link, okies? And don't run with scissors, because you're just going to poke somebody's eye out with that thing. No, really. 
3 Comments:
man, why cant i get the cool fortunes. All i get is stuff like,
*you are awesome...
*you will be the ruler of the world...
*your greatness inspires others...
and other such bullshit
i mean, really, we all know its true, but i dont need anyone to tell me stuff i already know.
I want cool sayings like "The view changes only for the leading dog."
if you think about it, its tell you that everyone else looks at someones else butthole. thats pretty awesome and riskee!
*note: i cant spell riskee
You think that am bad? Me get things like...
"Our lives are to be happy happy joy times"
"You have strengths others can not see"
"You long to see the wonders of the world"
"If you practice, you will become the best"
"you are like the monkey, curious and full of humor in your stumblings"
"You move fast and like to get things done right away"
"You will find the person who fits you after trying on many others"
"The Happy Lucky Businessman knows to bury joy and family in his donkey's heart."
OH and by way, one about leading dog become less cool when you play game where you put ",in bed!" at end of fortune, But it do help that one that go "your greatness inspires others... ,in bed!"
Yes, I automatically added "...in bed" to all your fortunes, and the one about the dog's view is tempered a bit by the mental image that causes.
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