Monday, April 03, 2006

You're not fat ... you're just full of neutrinos!

COSMIC GALL

Neutrinos, they are very small.
They have no charge and have no mass
And do not interact at all.
The earth is just a silly ball
To them, through which they simply pass,
Like dustmaids down a drafty hall
Or photons through a sheet of glass.
They snub the most exquisite gas,
Ignore the most substantial wall,
Cold shoulder steel and sounding brass,
Insult the stallion in his stall,
And, scorning barriers of class,
Infiltrate you and me. Like tall
And painless guillotines they fall
Down through our heads into the grass.
At night, they enter at Nepal
And pierce the lover and his lass
From underneath the bed - you call
It wonderful; I call it crass.
- John Updike

Thursday, the smarties at Fermilab's MINOS project released the first results of new neutrino experiments: "Blah blah oscillation, blah blah disappearance, blah blah blah blah — oh yeah, and by the way, we've confirmed neutrinos have mass."

Throw your standard model out the door. It just became more obsolete than your Commodore 64. (I know, I know ... that's a "collector's item.")

Why should you care? Because the sun produces two hundred trillion trillion trillion neutrinos every second — in fact, every second, billions are shooting their way through your body. And if they all have mass ...

... well, goshdarnit, you're not fat, you're just weighted down by extra neutrino mass!

Okay, not really. But there are plenty of stupid people in the world, and they won't know the difference.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

DAMN

this has more implications that just the standard model. This also effects just how the big bang/universe theory works out.

Now that neutrino's are known to have mass, is it enough to be the cold dark matter that pretty much has to be invoked to have the galaxies orbital velocites and all that jazz line up?

11:02 PM  
Blogger angrygrrface said...

hmm. i sort of wish i had paid attention in science class now.

i know, i know, i'm going to hell.

4:01 AM  
Blogger Monstee said...

FINALLY!!! The fools am beginning to see the light!!

Yes, Dr. Anonymous, the ramifications of neutrino's having mass am staggering. Not only big bang but things like cosmic strings, wormholes and quirks about black hole event horizons may now be answered. As to the dark matter issue. Maybe. But if we apply the observed mass to ALL neutrinos estimated to exist... it am TOO MUCH matter. So, they clearly need to look into FACT of neutrino transformation and neutrino decay.

Funny thing, do you realize that this am one more step in direction of proving extra dimensional flux and all that other sciency stuff me was spouting some time ago round here. It am the mathematicians that be having the last laugh when the physicists get around to proving that silly little multi dimensional grand unification theory that have been laying round gathering dust since they all laughed it out of town. Small minded little tools!

5:25 AM  

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