Oh no you didn't, girlfriend!

Mom always told me to watch what I say, because chances are somebody is always listening. Who knew it could be the entire cable TV-watching public? O_o

[Edit: For those who hadn't seen this on the news (or Letterman!), CNN's Kyra Phillips left her mic on while she took a bathroom break during President Bush's speech in New Orleans on the one-year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. The whole story is here.)

A man with a pig gig

On the way into work this morning, I passed a truck with a sign advertising Mike Sullivan Wildlife Services, a member of the National Wildlife Control Operators Association. (Hey, Mike Sullivan, I noticed your sign! Your advertising money is well-spent.)

Mike Sullivan's sign says he does trappings and removals of a number of species, including (but not limited to) oppossums, raccoons and feral hogs.

Yes, feral hogs.

Is that a major problem around here? Is that a major problem anywhere? I mean, I know there was the (in)famous Hogzilla a couple of years ago. ... I thought it was a once-in-a-lifetime kind of thing, but apparently, there's an underground invasion of wild-eyed feral hogs.

[Go ahead and wince; the next line is horribly punny...] Guess we should be on the lookout for a close encounter of the absurd swine.

Oh come on, I know you giggled.

My food speaks to me

Being sick the past three weeks or so, I haven't been very hungry. And being not very hungry has made me drop a few pounds. I'd say it's around 20 now.

So when I'm actually in the mood to eat, it's a good thing. I mean, keeping my strength up and all that.

Today, I was in the mood for lunch -- that's progress. I IMd one of the designers, Laura, to ask if she'd like to walk down the street for take-out. Yes, most people in our (quite small) office communicate via IM or e-mail. I think it's so there's a record of anything anybody's ever said ("I didn't say that!" "Yes you did, in this e-mail dated March 2004!"). Still, it strikes me as pretty lazy. I probably walk to other people's desks more often than most people, and even then, it's not much.

Anyway, Laura and I walked down to a Southern home cooking place called Simply For Me. Do they have plate lunches up North? I mean, plate lunches like they have here? Downtown here, most of the restaurants -- even a lot of the bars -- have a meat 'n' three as standard fare Monday through Friday. The plate lunch today was a real Southern classic: smothered chicken and dressing, green beans, yams, cranberry sauce, and a wheat roll. I think they include the wheat roll so you can say you had something lo-cal for lunch.

Laura and I ordered our take-out plate lunches, along with a slice of the chocolate marble cake. Now, Simply For Me isn't just another meat 'n' three lunch joint. They also make the best darn cakes Downtown. Every time somebody in the office has a birthday, we get a butter pecan or coconut or pineapple or Neapolitan cake from Simply For Me, which means one of their delectable creations graces our break room once a week, on average.

We walked back to the office and I ate my yummy yummy yams. Man, food that tasted good! Yay! But it turns out I wasn't as hungry as I'd anticipated, so I threw away half my lunch. I left the cake on my desk in case I wanted it later.

About 3 p.m., I was craving a taste of chocolate-y marble-y cake-y goodness, so I opened the styrofoam container ...

... and saw the note inside. I think Sandy left it. She brought me a bag of homegrown pears last week. Oh, and she left a pile of fresh blueberries wrapped in a paper towel on my desk a couple of weeks ago, labeled "For your health :-)". So, yeah, chances are the note was from Sandy.

I started giggling uncontrollably ... then I closed the cake back up and stuck it in the fridge. I'm sure one of the reporters will want it tomorrow.

I'm not stupid... I know if I'm actually feeling hungry, I should take the opportunity to eat superfoods (a la blueberries and pears). So while the thought of chocolate marble cake still sounds good six hours later, I'm going to be good.

Sandy will be proud.

More bloodwork

Had my CBC this morning, and my white count is still almost double what
it should be. I'm on a new antibiotic -- my sixth. This isn't funny
anymore.
--katesink

National Punctuation Day 2006

[EDIT: I'm an idiot. NPD is September 24, so there's still plenty of time to plan a celebration. My bad.]

Thursday is National Punctuation Day, a day in which we lowly copy editors contemplate the comma, admire the apostrophe and ponder the parentheses. (Go here for the good, bad and ugly.)

Some editors might see National Punctuation Day as a good time to debate the merits and vices of Strunk and White. Not me. I'd much prefer to put my editing skills to use – and I want you to help, Memphians.

After work tomorrow, my coworkers, my red pen, and I are making our way down to Flying Saucer Downtown (130 Peabody Place), where I will order a fine bottle of Lindemans Kriek.

... Then I'm going to ceremoniously draw an apostrophe between the "n" and the "s" on the label.

... Then I'm going to open the bottle and drink it.

I'd appreciate your support in my efforts to make the world a more correctly punctuated place by joining me at Flying Saucer Thursday after work and helping me celebrate. :-)

P.S. If you're not in the Memphis area (e.g. most of you), help me celebrate virtually by taking the punctuation mark personality test. I'm a period, as described here.

Garbage in, garbage out

Guess who's discovered the trash can? Joe. Sigh. Fortunately, there wasn't anything more dangerous in there than a toothpaste box, Kleenex, and a magazine.

She's also discovered the joys of jumping in the dirty clothes hamper, trying to climb the fake ficus (the fake-us), and attempting to sneak into the clothes dryer -- God help us all.

All this bad behavior is allowing Joe to get well-acquainted with her new arch-nemesis: The Spray Bottle of Punishment (TSBoP). I fully expect a kitten vs. water battle around here any day now.

Weekend fun: Staying home, blowing bubbles

Paul and I ventured out of the house today (for lunch and to buy sheets for our new king-size pillowtop visco-foam mattress). Didn't take long for us to get all tired-ish, so we came back home and took a nap.

Too bored to stay in the house; too tired to leave.

The doctors have made it quite clear that I should be in the hospital on an IV, with the infection and the asthma and all. I think they're being overdramatic. Maybe I shouldn't have been going into work every day, but without any proof I was sick (e.g. fever), I couldn't justify staying home.

I've made a list of what to take when. I've finished the azithromycin and Bidex, but I'm still taking Prednisone, Mucinex, Singulair, Flovent, Levaquin, Duo-Neb and Keflex (on top of my regular medicines). And I've had two horribly painful can't-sit-down-afterwards shots of Rocephin. The worst is the nebulizer. I actually have a machine at home now that I have to breathe through three times a day for about 10 minutes at a time. I'm really really ready to be over this, even if I lost an additional 11 pounds between Aug. 9 and 18 just from being unable to eat.

Paul and I have passed the time by playing a lot of NES-era Bubble Bobble. I lurve me some Bubble Bobble! Only problem is that there's only ... one ... song ... and ... it ... plays ... over ... and ... over ... and ... over ... making for a rather monotonous auditory experience. It's going to be stuck in my head all night.

And when we beat Bubble Bobble -- if we beat Bubble Bobble -- we have a lot of other great NES games we haven't played in years: Spy Vs. Spy, River City Ransom, Burgertime, Mike Tyson's Punch-Out, Tiny Toon Adventures, and at least a dozen more. We've turned our breakfast room into our NES nook, with an extra TV, love seat and La-Z-Boy, and cool artwork (a framed Spongebob Squarepants and a retro metal sign that says "Reality is for losers who don't play video games").

Hey, any other Bubble Bobble fans out there? We've done levels 00-99 and gone through the secret door and now we're on level A3. How many more levels are there??

I'm DYYYIN' WOOOAH WOAH WOAH WOOOOAH

This is Paul-
Apparently, Kate is super sick, so sick that she got an antibiotic shot - and that hurts. Good news, she doesnt have p-knew-mone-ya.

Also - i'm sick too, but not as bad. i get regular antibiotics, for TEN days, three more than the regular seven, im so special.

Ok, bye bye

Doctors, babies, and Elvis ... All in one post!

51 days 'til Destin. 51 days. I think if I focus on, you know, happy things then I won't think so much about being sick. I went to an internist yesterday to see if he could fix me. He put me on Prednisone, plus a new decongestant and a couple of asthma maintenance drugs. He also gave me a pneumonia vaccine and took some baseline bloodwork.

About 20 minutes after I left, I got a voicemail from the nurse. "We have the results of one of your blood tests back, and I need you to call me right away." Yeah, that's not good. I called her back and she said that my white count was about double what it should be. Bad bad bad. So she called in a couple more days of steroids and reminded me to finish my antibiotic. I feel like crap. But I've got work to finish, so I'm dragging myself to work despite my better judgment.

Yeah, 51 days until my 10-day beach vacation. :-) Be jealous.

Ooh ooh! I'm planning a baby shower. This is new (scary) territory for me. I'm not much of a fan of going to showers, so finding myself planning one ... alone ... is kind of strange. It's for a former coworker who's having her baby in October, so it's going to be a Friday after-work thing in the back room of my favorite coffeehouse. You know, it's not so much that I'm worried about my planning ability, but I still feel the need to confirm every step with at least one other coworker: "Is this a stupid idea?"

I'm sure over the next couple of weeks, I'll be blogging about the shower -- e.g. Do my invitations suck? Look at it this way: You'll be vicariously planning a shower with me! Isn't that exciting?!

P.S. The Elvis vigil is tonight. Watch the GracelandCams online or listen to the vigil on SIRIUS.

Sleepy Sunday afternoon

Ah, Sunday afternoon. It's been pretty relaxing so far -- lots of Forensic Files and Court TV, lunch with the in-laws, etc. I bought a swank new watch with a compass and a hydrometer, and Jo and Matt came over last night for games.

The problem is that, as well as the weekend's going, I still feel like crap. The Minor Med doc I saw Tuesday told me if I didn't feel better in three days, I needed to see my primary care doctor. Problem is my PCP skipped town in June without warning, so I am doctorless at the moment (as are my parents, Paul, and his parents and brother).

This morning was the worst. I was up pretty late -- 3 a.m., I think -- and I woke up feeling like I might cough and wheeze to death. I have a second round of antibiotics I start Tuesday, so we'll see if that knocks out the infection.

Well, that was a really long-winded way of apologizing for not posting in a few days. It's not that I don't lurve my blog any more; I'm just not feeling like doing much of anything. Maybe I brought this on myself by going back to work when the doctor told me to take two sick days. Now I feel stupid for not just doing what she told me to do. :(

Somebody got a good chicken soup recipe? One a chemist can follow?

The argument was pointless, but I was still right

Interesting phenom: the continuing popularity of teen mags, a la Tiger Beat. Perhaps it's because I managed to make it through my tween/teen years without buying one. I didn't grow up drooling over some Hollywood superstar -- I mean, who was there to drool over? Fred Savage?

Paul and I were browsing the magazine aisle in Walgreens the other night, and I picked up a copy of a teen mag titled M Magazine. Honestly, the sheet of celeb-faced glitter tattoos caught my eye.

I poked Paul in the ribs. "Hey, check it -- glitter tattoos!" He rolled his eyes and glanced at the cover. "Hey, are those the twins that played that kid on Full House?"

"That kid?" I asked. "There were two boys on Full House."

What ensued was a long, pointless argument about the children of Full House. The conclusion: The twin girls in the cast (Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen) played one character named Michelle Tanner. However, the twin boys in the cast played two characters named Alex and Nicky Katsopolis. Thank you, Wikipedia, for settling that argument -- especially since I was right.

Oh, and the boys on the magazine cover weren't the ones on Full House anyway, although the mag-cover boys did star (wearing a lot of lipstick, no less) in this rather disturbing movie. Yep, that's a boy on the movie poster. :-/

So there you have it, one of the top ten most pointless arguments I've ever had. Can anyone top it?

Turn your head and cough

For the second time in four months, I have a sinus infection. Bummer. A few years ago, my ENT found a cyst in my left sinus. He said if it didn't flare up, I might never need to get it removed. But now my sinuses are interfering with my asthma, and the doctor I saw today told me I might want to ask the ENT about removing the cyst. Again, bummer.

Got two Z-Paks to knock out the infection, Bidex for congestion, a new albuterol inhaler, plus a sinus cocktail shot and a breathing treatment with the nebulizer because I was wheezing like nobody's business. Bah.

Ooh ooh! But I'd lost 21 pounds since I was last at the doctor! That has to count for something, right?

Classic Paulisms #1

And now, the inauguration of a weekly post I shall call "Classic Paulisms."

Q: Who plays the Pinball Wizard in the 1975 movie musical Tommy?
A: Elton John
Paul's Answer: Fred Savage

Q: What pop singer's 1999 gastric bypass surgery was broadcast live on the Internet?
A: Carnie Wilson
Paul's Answer: Michael Vandross (A few seconds later, he said, "Wait! I meant Luther Vandross! I couldn't think of his first name!!" Then he looked so crushed when we told him Luther Vandross wasn't a pop singer.)

Q: (During a series of questions themed around ice, ice skating, etc.) Which rap artist was born O'Shea Jackson?
A: Ice Cube
Paul's Answer: P. Diddy

Q: The final scene of what 2001 movie, starring Jon Favreau and Vince Vaughn, takes place in a Chuck E. Cheese's?
A: Made
Paul's Answer: Reservoir Dogs

He's so intelligent, and yet there are times when he makes me feel so smart. :-)

It IS August, right?

Walgreen's has out Halloween candy. Who buys Halloween candy two months
in advance?
--katesink

So, Kate WANTED to post, but i won't let her.

You see, i have to "write" a ~40 page paper. So i had to commandeer the laptop. But i think we are going to be rectifying the situation this weekend during the tax holiday. Wal-mart has a pretty good deal on a "modern" laptop - and i have been wanting a faster, newer one for a bit for uh...my dissertation.

Oh yeah, this was Paul, not Kate, i didn't feel like logging in. I'm kind of lazy like that.

[Edit from Kate: I took the laptop back from Paul. He opted to not work on his paper tonight in favor of watching a documentary on The History Channel about pistachios. Yes, there's a whole documentary on pistachios ... and Paul just called them "terror nuts," whatever that means.]

Guilty pleasure

I worked late, fed the cats, and now I'm snacking on the remains of lukewarm chicken soup from lunch. Paul won't be home for a while yet, so I'm going to watch a Columbo mystery, circa 1974.

Please tell me I'm not the only person who watches legal fluff on TV. In junior high, I went to a writing competition and penned an essay on how I wanted to be a lawyer when I grew up. Then I realized Matlock wasn't a very good representation of the way the courtroom really worked, so I gave up my legal dreams.

But, in a strange twist of fate, I won an award for that junior high essay, thus propelling me into journalism. Guess I can thank TV legal fluff for inspiring my career, eh?